When I announced I was pregnant on Facebook a few months ago, lots of our friends were shocked. Many of them remembered hearing me say I'd never do this again, and others thought we were "getting it all done at once" with the twin thing. But... here we are, pregnant again!
I've always had a longing to experience one baby, but I was so afraid of getting pregnant with twins again. I went back and forth, my mind always shutting down the idea of having more children with logical reasons, but my heart didn't feel the same way. The door to having more children was never fully closed, but it was certainly only open a crack.
After a rather intense experience with a clairvoyant (hah, did I just lose you there?), I knew in my heart I had a son waiting for me. So, I invited him into our lives. I have always felt as though I were meant to mother a son, and I really thought the twins would be boys, but it turned out they were girls which I was very excited about. There was just... someone else waiting for me.
We got pregnant in the beginning of summer and were immediately panicked. The day I got a positive test result I called my doctor to confirm and book an ultrasound. I spent the next few weeks worrying, regretting, hoping. Finally our appointment came after what seemed like centuries. I waited for those fateful words "I see one healthy baby", and broke into tears. One Healthy Baby! I've always wanted one baby! I asked the ultrasound technician about five more times if she was sure. She was! Relief, bliss, excitement came over me.
I only had one more question... was it a boy? Was it the son I've been waiting for?
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